So many recent headlines have focused on Mo’Nique’s very public beef with “Empire” creator, director Lee Daniels and the whole blackballed thing. All the back and forth bickering seemed petty, but it did shed light on some weighty issues.
Mo’Nique says part of the reason why she didn’t “play ball” and attend every Hollywood gathering was because she needed to spend time with her family. Some called her reason more of an excuse and a cop out. But Mo’Nique says ignoring her family in the pursuit of fame has cost her dearly, “This is my third marriage. [With] the first two marriages, I was chasing [fame] and really didn’t understand what it is to be a wife.” Mo’Nique says the biggest casualty of her former work vs. family choices was her relationship with her oldest son, “Now that my son is 25, we have a very strained relationship because during that time when he was a little boy I was out chasing, so my prayer was ‘please give me another chance.”
Mo’Nique’s dilemma is a problem not only celebs face. Whether you work as a lawyer or at the McDonald’s down the street if you’re a single mother or married with children, you have to deal with how to balance work and family.
These days, there are plenty of single dads raising the kids, but when the woman is present, the responsibility of children still often falls on the mother. And rightly so in some regards-there are some issues that simply aren’t a matter of choice, but have been wired into a mother’s DNA via biological or maternal instincts. It’s those maternal instincts that leave a mother feeling trapped when the babysitter calls out sick and she has a demanding presentation at work.
Is there some magical formula for balancing the two worlds? No, parenting is often on the job training—we learn what’s best as we parent. But keeping work in the proper perspective can help-work is what we do to provide the comforts and necessities of life. Our children and our family are our lives. Sharing a movie, playing in the park or just sitting and talking gives your child a firm foundation of love and caring. Mo’Nique has learned the hard way, there simply is no job or pay check worth that.
What do you think?